Aug 14 2015

Navel Lint

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AARP online featured this article: Understand the Early Signs of Dementia: Take the Memory Quiz. Hot damn, doesn’t that sound like fun? Frankly, I take a memory quiz every morning when I try to find my car keys.

Do you shop on line? You know that place that allows you to choose the order in which you want to see items? Who the hell ever chooses PRICE: HIGHEST TO LOWEST?

The local investigative reporters have discovered the reason we greedy town folk are using more water than last year is that we’re watering our lawns. Hell, you just have to drive around town to see we’re not doing a whole lot of that. What those reporters totally missed is that our little dog Caesar has been syphoning water out of the end of the garden hose so he can pee on every bush.

August 10 is National S’More Day. To celebrate, there will be no calories in chocolate, graham crackers and marshmallows. Go hog wild. And while you’re at it, purchase s’more calorie-free Linda B Myers books on Amazon. Okay, I know I should be ashamed. Sometimes marketing is a real bitch. Sometimes I am, too.

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1 comment

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